[x]

Hard at Work (drunk poem)I hired a man from the yellow pages
to cut my lawn, as I've simply no time
to do it myself. But he came over
dressed as a policeman, and told me
I had been bad. Oh my, and then...
...nevermind. No more shall I call
Men - Hard at Work, again.

Thank god my lawn is gated;
the neighbors, what would they think?

To a believer.Fancy me a fool?
Some sort of ass or mule?
You've got to be kidding,
when you say an invisible force will do its bidding.
In the winter you give children toys;
but your clergy bugger little boys.
But oh wait there's more,
funny ones, they bang their heads against the floor.
Blow up buildings for something they read in a book,
wonder how cunning was the writer,
bloody clever crook.

They're all the same,
innocent people they blame.
Aren't you a bit too old,
to believe the madness you are told?
This weird obsession,
of believing in one.
Look at the Greeks,
they had many- now that was fun.

Every time they open their mouth,
even more nonsense th

Sophie and Phillip's pesterlog-- CheckeredFlynn [RS] started pestering SharpShooter [TA] at 10:08 --

[10:08] CF: Hey Phil :3

[10:09] SS: umm..yeah..hi. (:

[10:09] CF: Watcha doin? o:

[10:09] CF: As in, you know. Besides being all cool and shit c:

[10:09] CF: Have you reached the God tier yet?

[10:09] SS: nah..

[10:09] SS: I'm just here taking a break from a troll's still buggin' me about that shit

[10:09] SS: like, how I'm all going to be powerful and stuff

[10:09] CF: You WILL!

[10:10] CF: Dude, I'm a fucking Mage of Blood!

[10:10] CF: what can be more fucking stronger than that?!

[10:10] SS: You did got your self killed in that un-cool, sleeping, rock bed ri

1Z Listu do Zjednoczonych Krain.
"[...] Pokonaliśmy Niszczyciela dzięki Poświęconej. Osiem krain kiedyś oddzielnych teraz się zjednoczyły. Woda, Morze, Światła, Mrok, Ogień, Wiatr, Czas no i epicentrum Wiara. Cykl ten zakończył się ze śmiercią Adhary Poświęconej i Sana z Ahmalem którzy byli Niszczycielami. To daje nam nowy cykl. Cykl Talizmanu Mocy. [...]"
Plac ćwiczebny Akademii Jeźdźców Smoków był prawie pusty. Na środku areny stała dziewczyna miała zamknięte oczy. Jej czarne włosy z grana

Goodnight, CthulhuSing a song of madness,
An Old One never dies.
Four and twenty Shoggoths
Baked in a pie.

When the pie burst open,
The guests began to scream.
Wasn't that a wicked dish,
To complete Dagon's scheme?

Lord Cthulhu sleeps in R'leyh,
And sees us in our dreams;
Nyarlathotep babbles in the dark,
And feeds upon our screams.

The cliff-ghasts now are flying free,
Hunting for fresh meat;
And if they catch you dreaming,
Your doom will be complete.

Pome to MortBlurble and blargle!
The fungle's like marble...
The flustig is blowing,
And such is the way,
Of stating your case,
When reason holds sway...
It's not that I'm jaznick,
Or terribly garblous...
Or wanting a chat,
or something quite farblous....
So whenever your fungle
is open to air,
and your blushniks are blushing...
Without any fears...
A short danggly missive,
portraying, your wishes...
will suffice to inform me,
(oh it's just so delicious!)
Of when you're on, netwise..
so both of us, (gleebly)
can verily cheerably,
greet appositely,
and nothing unsightly
shall mar the endeavour
when gaily, together,
We'll mingle our rhymes....

Big word, Little shinxI’m in the dark, just a little shinx.
These big dogs keep talking the big bark, but I’ll show em when the rain comes.
This little kitty can do more than shine in the night,
I’ll paint these gym walls with red your fright.
Gold fur and a heart of black, my trainer stabbed me in the back.
Broken and bloody I won’t give up till she’s crying over my dead body.
As you look into my eyes the last thing you’ll see is the most hurt part of me.
I’ll protect my innocence behind this fiery bolt,
Rock smash, rock tomb, I already know it’s my doom.
Take my swagger like a thief; I’ll double team th

The reason that students must learn history"Sir! Why should I learn history?"

I gave him a clout with my knuckles.

"Oh! Why are you hitting my head?"

Again, I gave him a clout with my knuckles.

"Shit! Why are you hitting my head? Why should I learn history?"

The student protests again. I put out this splendid answer.

"If you did not remember that you hit, When I hit you again, Could you avoid?"

PeoplePeople jump, dance, and fly.
They can be happy or they can cry.

They have pets like dogs and cats,
And dress them up in funny hats.

They learn and think,
And eat and drink.

At night they make theaters ring,
When they act, dance, and sing.

Then they go home and sleep,
By counting many little sheep.

OnCe UpOn A mOtHeRfUcKiN tImE OnCe UpOn A mOtHeRfUcKiN tImE tHeRe WaS a LiTtLe MoThErFuCkEr.

ThAt GrEw Up SuRrOuNdEd By OtHeR lItTlE mOtHeRfUcKeRs.

tHeSe OtHeR lItTlE mOtHeRfUcKeRs WeNt OuTsIdE tO pLaY a KiCkAsS mOtHeRfUcKiN gAmE.

tHe MoThErFuCkErS fOuNd A bUnCh Of SqUaRe ShApEd MoThErFuCkIn MiRaClEs.

ThAn EvErY mOtHeRfUcKeR dIeD bEcAuSe ThE mIrAcLeS wErE tOo MoThErFuCkIn AmAzInG.

tHe EnD.

hOnK :0)

Off TopicIt all started when I was 13 years,
7 months, 2 weeks,
4 days, 6 hours,
12 minutes & 14 seconds old.

Wait, now that I think about it,
now it would be 15 seconds.
16. 17. 18. 19.
20. 21. 22. 24.
Crap, forgot 23.

Shoot,
Where was I? I lost track...
I think I was at 20-something...
Wait, wait, wait, hang on.
What story was I telling again?

LampOnly the porcelain shards lying around the shade
Offered that this was more than just
A typical garbage day. The workers were too absorbed
In their regrets and shames to study the interesting aspects
Of the disposal,
And the children went back to their ball game.
So the event passed and history’s library listed it as
“Nonexistent,” but life was wrong: the lamp
Was chauffeured across town, its final destination the dump,
Where it sat beside a rotting banana peel and gleamed in the sunlight.

“That pleasant shiny thing,” the birds cawed,
Never thinking that their well-know distraction
Was an elegant ancient covered

Don't you dareRoses are red
I really don't care
Lay a finger on my love
And you'll go flying through the air

Let's be friendsWhen it’s fall and all leaves fall,
Twisted trees stand bare and tall.
The truth I’m gonna tell you, see,
Is just as bare as such a tree.

People meet, and dine, and drink,
They have fun and glasses clink.
But you see, I kinda think
Our novel’s got no ink.

You look hot, you really do,
You can get a prince, or two;
You look smart like a pop star
All guys watch you from afar.

But you know that yoü and I,
We’re the ground and the sky -
We can talk, but look, in fact,
There’s no point of contact.

Maybe we just need some time,
And it won’t be such a crime
If we, well, at least so far,
Be just friends, li

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Hickory terpsichore trickery

by ~Cigarash, Sep 24, 2007, 6:42:51 PM
Literature / Poetry / Humor / Free Verse

With a certain amount
Of magical trickery
He sat in his house made of bone

With a candle whose flame
Was a little bit flickery
He’d made sure he was there all alone

He was able to make
A doll made of hickory
Completely devoid of emotion

Appear to be practising
Ancient terpsichore
By the right application of lotion

He sat there so smug
With a drink made of chicory
Pleased with the progress he’d made

With his hickory trickery
Low lit terpsichore
Miniature person charade

Hickory terpsichore trickeryby ~Cigarash

Literature / Poetry / Humor / Free Verse

Odd even by my standards. Terpsichore (pronounced tersickory) is one of my favourite words, and basically means 'dancing'. I felt like using it somehow, and this was the result. Hopefully some of you will get a kick out of it.

~~love 0 0~~

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~simeberg Oct 1, 2007 Professional Filmographer

What fun! I definitely got a kick(ery) out of it.

Not sure if you want critique, but I thought I'd just point out "make" and "made" in the third stanza. Does that work?

The last stanza is glorious! (Despite the fact that I have to put aside my British pronunciation for the last word

)

~Cigarash Oct 1, 2007

Thanks very much. The whole make/made thing works fine for me. I always proof read before I submit anything, and when I wrote it and also when I read it, I had no issues therein.

I also loved the last stanza. I was particularly pleased with the fact that I had written the previous one and didn't have to re-write any of it to accommodate it.

~simeberg Oct 2, 2007 Professional Filmographer

Yeah, like I said, I wasn't sure - it is an isolated instance of repetition on the one hand, but on the other, it can only help rhythm-wise.

Now that you mention the penultimate stanza, something's bugging me. It's a rhythmic/scanning thing, something to do with the line "he sat there so smug", but I'm so rusty on poetry that I don't really know why it's bothering me. I tried counting syllables and counted through the whole poem and then just found myself even more bamboozled. I think the hickory trickery wickery clickery nickery terpsichore just got me all tied up in knots. And that's what's so brilliant about this - it's got this kind of spastic lurching rhythm and clangy clumpy but rather agile words (like drunk dancers in unlaced army boots) that really knocks about in your head.

So much so that after umming and ahing about whether to fav it yesterday and deciding not to (I'm quite needlessly tight with favs for some reason - I guess cos it's the only currency you've got on here and I want to keep the value high), I was compelled to come back here to look at it again. So yeah, it's got stuck in my head, and despite being utterly frivolous, has an atmosphere you can almost taste (hickory or chickory - and what do they taste like anyway?).

Well then, here you go: simeberg's

#5!

Thanks for this, it makes me grin ear to ear whenever I read it. Have a cigar for me. I'll smoke a marlboro in your honour.

~Cigarash Oct 2, 2007

Thanks very much, for the fav, the devwatch, and also the awesome comments. I always appreciate comments/favs, and it's so much nicer when it's clearly got some feelings behind the sentiment. Thanks so much, once again. I'll be sure to enjoy that cigar.

Ash.

*Wivelrod Sep 30, 2007 Hobbyist Photographer

Definately classified "odd", but somewhat brilliant at the same time

~DrgnBane Sep 25, 2007

Read that three times fast.

~Cigarash Sep 25, 2007

It was tricky enough writing it.

*Bogbrush Sep 25, 2007

Very clever, and slightly macabre too - I think it's the bone house that lends a dark feel to the whole piece and the last verse reminds me of either Yes, Minister or The Two Ronnies

~Cigarash Sep 25, 2007

Thanks very much, I'd not originally thought of the Two Ronnies, but now you mention it......

~Nevlusti Sep 25, 2007 Student

Wow, that is pretty awesome. I had to try to say that last part 5 or 6 times to get it right haha, great use of phonetics.

=Awesomeness

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